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Articles
Give
Me a Child: Prayers for
Conception
by Rabbi Nina
Beth Cardin
Introductory essay on the emotional and spiritual
struggles of infertility. Fertility.
Hayyei
Sarah by
Shana Roskies
Roskies brings to life the Genesis tale of Sarah, Abraham
and Hagar by placing Sarah and Abraham’s infertility
as the central factor motivating the characters’
behavior. Fertility.
Liberating
Reproduction From Despair
by Allen
Selis
Article includes reflection on Talmud passage (Balvi,
Niddah 31a) and the Iggeret Hakodesh, a mystical text
offering a “path for sanctifying sprituality”.
Ends with a brief ritual which preceeds IVF.
Fertility.
Mourning
Loss by
Rabbi Nina Beth Cardin
Essay on the spiritual and emotional issues one
encounters when facing pregancy loss or stillbith.
Miscarriage.
Terminolgy
and Background Information
Essay which includes “definitions relating to
pregnancy losses’’; describes the “phases
of attachment” to fetus and child during pregnancy
and after birth; and closes with sections describing
“phases of mourning” and “typical
behaviors of grief”. Miscarriage.
Suggestions
for Those Reaching Out to the Bereaved
Essay which helps care-givers, and loved ones reach out
to those who are grieving the loss of a baby due to
miscarriage, stillbirth or neonatal death.
Miscarriage.
Pregnant?
Don’t Eat Radishes
by Emily
Taitz
Article describes charms, prayers and customs that Jewish
women adopted over-time to help ensure a safe pregnancy
and delivery. Pregnancy.
What
Should Jewish Ritual Practice be Following a
Stillbirth?
by Rabbi Stephanie Dickstein
Argument for fuller ritual response for stillbirth.
Author makes argument based on the Conservative
movement’s decision to make parents mourners for
children who die less than 31 days of age.
Stillbirth.
A
Midwife’s Kaddish
by Diane
Solomon
Personal essay on auathor’s journey and that of her
Unitarian husband through stillbith delivery and burial
of child. Stillbirth.
Entire
Rituals
Ritual
for Grief Following Therapeutic Loss
by Rabbi Amy
Eilberg
Ritual for couple who is grieving loss of child from
therapeutic abortion Abortion.
Abortion:
A Ritual upon Termination of a Pregnancy
by Leila
Berner
A ritual for a woman who has had an abortion. Includes
sections on “Affirming One’s Choices, Sharing
the Pain, Affirming One’s Self, Surviving and Being
Thankful, Seeking Healing.” Abortion.
Finding
Comfort After a Miscarriage
by Susan
Grossman
Complete ritual included with personal introduction.
Miscarriage.
A
Grieving Ritual Following Miscarriage or Stillbirth
by Amy
Eilberg
A ritual divided into three parts: Mourning the Loss,
Choosing Life Again and Communal Support and Blessings.
Contemporary with selections in Hebrew taken from the
Psalms, Job, and Deuteronomy. Miscarriage.
Ritual
for Loss of Pregnancy
by Rabbi
Shira Stern
Template for service to mourn all kinds of pregnancy
loss. Miscarriage.
Memorial
Service for Our Baby and a Reawakening of Hope
by
Susanah/Ted
Example of a complete ceremony developed by the couple
who faced the loss. Stillbirth.
First
Person Accounts
A
Longing for Children
by Julie
Stockler
Personal essay on grieving the inability to bear
children. Author in dialog with deceased grandmother
about whether she has the permission to mourn.
Fertility.
Neonatal
Death by
Susan Knightly
Personal account of a couple holding, burying, and then
sitting shiva (traditional Jewish mourning practice) for
a baby delivered at five months. Miscarriage.
Baby
Brother’s Gone to Heaven
by Anne-Lynne
Keplar
Description by a mother of her six-year-old son’s
response to the death of his stillborn brother.
Stillbirth.
I
Lost a Child But Did Not Mourn Her
by Ron
Wolfson
Personal account describing the author’s experience
of stillbirth before rituals were developed to encourage
mourning. Stillbirth.
Prayers
Prayer
to be Said When Preparing for the End of the
Pregnancy
Prayer to be said when pregnancy must be ended
therapeutically. Abortion.
A
Prayer for the Wonder of Our
Bodies
This prayer form the morning service expresses awe at the
intricate workings of the human body. It may be recited
before or after an examination or a procedure.
Fertility.
Prayers
to be said Before an
Examination
by Michelle Goldsmith, Tikva Frymer-Kensky
Four prayers that may be said before a medical exam for
those undergoing fertility treatment/counseling.
Fertility.
Prayers
to be Said Before a
Procedure
Biblical verses form three prayers “to be said
before a procedure”, “Verses to be said upon
insemination” and “Verses to be recited upon
arising from a procedure.” Fertility.
Prayer
to be Said While
Waiting
This is a prayer to be said while waiting to conceive and
bear a child. Fertility.
Prayer
for Those Having Difficulty Conceiving
by Rabbi Nina
Beth Cardin
A prayer based on Song of Songs and Psalm 22 for those
having difficulty conceiving “phrased in the plural
and written in the voice of a married couple. It is
easily adaptable for an infertile person to say on her or
his own.” Fertility.
Hannah’s
Prayer by
Berakhot 31b Translated by Nina Beth Cardin, 1982
"If I am an angel, then let me live forever. But if I am
mortal, then grant me a child...” Fertility.
Sing
us a Lullaby
A prayer for the husband and wife to say during the first
month of the loss. Miscarriage.
Living
Waters
A prayer to be said before a woman enters the waters of
the mikveh or a bath. Miscarriage.
After
a Miscarriage: Hold Me Now
by Vicki
Hollander
A contemporary prayer to Hayotzer, “one of the
seventy names of God..translated roughly as “One who
fashions, forms, creates.” Miscarriage.
Prayer
After Miscarriage or Stillbirth
by Sandy
Eisenberg Sasso
Prayer combining contemporary words and Hebrew from the
High Holy Day Amidah (standing silent prayer).
Miscarriage.
Ritual
Elements
Mikveh
Prayers: a Cool, Private
Place by
Rabbi Nina Beth Cardin
Describes the practice of going to a mikveh as it relates
to desire for conception. Includes two prayers “A
prayer for a child- to be said before entering the
mikveh” and “A prayer for the woman to say as
she is dressing to return home.” Fertility.
Prayers
and Rituals for a Friday Night
Two prayers “To be Said Upon Candlelighting”
and a “Wine Ritual for Friday Nights” are woven
into text which reflects on Shabbat and the desire for
conception. Fertility.
Segulot:
Fertility Folkways
by Nina Beth Cardin with others
Description of fertility folkways includes description of
two rituals (Tzedakah and Ritual for Changing one’s
Name) for improving chances of conception and healthy
pregnancy. Fertility.
Prayers
of Love
A brief ritual and reading for husband and wife to
nurture their love while using medical intervention for
fertility. Fertility.
A
Red Stone
Describes the tradition of the red stone which women have
historically worn as a tangible expression of their hopes
and fears. Fertility.
Song or
Poem
A
Lullaby for Courage
by Debbie Perlman
A new psalm for the woman to say when she goes to end her
pregnancy or when labor begins. Abortion.
Round
by Rachel Boimwall
A contemporary poem on the desire to conceive.
Fertility.
If
I had a Son
by Rahel Bluwstein
Contemporary prayer on desire for a son.
Fertility.
The
Stain by
Rabbi Nina Beth Cardin with Jane Schapiro and Lynne
Levin
Three contemporary poems addressing “the stain”
of blood which when trying to get pregnant “becomes
a sign of failure, of sadness, of emptiness, of
death.” Poems included: “Tapping a Stone”
by Jane Schapiro; “A Prayer for a woman in search of
comfort” and “The Bath” both by Lynn E.
Levin. Fertility.
Remembering
Our Love: Prayers for Husband and
Wife
by Rabbie Nina Beth Cardin
“Some nights are for rest, whether through medical
direction or inclination. Let these nights, then, be for
quiet and tenderness, for the presence of each other, and
for the comfort of now.” Poems and blessings for
those nights follow. Fertility.
To
the Baby I Never Had. To the Memory that I
Carry by
Reba Carmel
A woman mourns the child she lost. Miscarriage.
Healing
After a Miscarriage
by Merle Feld
“I want no platitudes, no stupid shallow comfort. I
hate all pregnant women, all new mothers, all soft
babies.” The anger is wonderfully honest in this
poem. Miscarriage.
When
My Baby Died
by Barbara Daniels
Poem describing author’s response to death of
her baby. Miscarriage.
Items Sorted by
Category
Abortion
Ritual
for Grief Following Therapeutic Loss
by Rabbi Amy
Eilberg
Ritual for couple who is grieving loss of child from
therapeutic abortion Entire Ritual.
Abortion:
A Ritual upon Termination of a Pregnancy
by Leila
Berner
A ritual for a woman who has had an abortion. Includes
sections on “Affirming One’s Choices, Sharing
the Pain, Affirming One’s Self, Surviving and Being
Thankful, Seeking Healing.” Entire Ritual.
Prayer
to be Said When Preparing for the End of the
Pregnancy
Prayer to be said when pregnancy must be ended
therapeutically. Prayer.
A
Lullaby for Courage
by Debbie Perlman
A new psalm for the woman to say when she goes to end her
pregnancy or when labor begins. Song/Poem.
Fertility
Give
Me a Child: Prayers for Conception
by Rabbi Nina
Beth Cardin
Introductory essay on the emotional and spiritual
struggles of infertility. Article.
Hayyei
Sarah by
Shana Roskies
Roskies brings to life the Genesis tale of Sarah, Abraham
and Hagar by placing Sarah and Abraham’s infertility
as the central factor motivating the characters’
behavior. Article.
Liberating
Reproduction From Despair
by Allen
Selis
Article includes reflection on Talmud passage (Balvi,
Niddah 31a) and the Iggeret Hakodesh, a mystical text
offering a “path for sanctifying sprituality”.
Ends with a brief ritual which preceeds IVF.
Article.
A
Longing for Children
by Julie
Stockler
Personal essay on grieving the inability to bear
children. Author in dialog with deceased grandmother
about whether she has the permission to mourn. First
Person Account.
A
Prayer for the Wonder of Our Bodies
This prayer form the morning service expresses awe at the
intricate workings of the human body. It may be recited
before or after an examination or a procedure.
Prayer.
Prayers
to be said Before an Examination
by Michelle
Goldsmith, Tikva Frymer-Kensky
Four prayers that may be said before a medical exam for
those undergoing fertility treatment/counseling.
Prayer.
Prayers
to be Said Before a Procedure
Biblical verses form three prayers “to be said
before a procedure”, “Verses to be said upon
insemination” and “Verses to be recited upon
arising from a procedure.” Prayer.
Prayer
to be Said While Waiting
This is a prayer to be said while waiting to conceive and
bear a child. Prayer.
Prayer
for Those Having Difficulty Conceiving
by Rabbi Nina
Beth Cardin
A prayer based on Song of Songs and Psalm 22 for those
having difficulty conceiving “phrased in the plural
and written in the voice of a married couple. It is
easily adaptable for an infertile person to say on her or
his own.” Prayer.
Hannah’s
Prayer by
Berakhot 31b Translated by Nina Beth Cardin, 1982
“If I am an angel, then let me live forever. But if
I am mortal, then grant me a child...”
Prayer.
Mikveh
Prayers: a Cool, Private Place
by Rabbi Nina
Beth Cardin
Describes the practice of going to a mikveh as it relates
to desire for conception. Includes two prayers “A
prayer for a child- to be said before entering the
mikveh” and “A prayer for the woman to say as
she is dressing to return home.” Ritual
Element.
Prayers
and Rituals for a Friday Night
Two prayers “To be Said Upon Candlelighting”
and a “Wine Ritual for Friday Nights” are woven
into text which reflects on Shabbat and the desire for
conception. Ritual Element.
Segulot:
Fertility Folkways
by Nina Beth Cardin with others
Description of fertility folkways includes description of
two rituals (Tzedakah and Ritual for Changing one’s
Name) for improving chances of conception and healthy
pregnancy. Ritual Element.
Prayers
of Love
A brief ritual and reading for husband and wife to
nurture their love while using medical intervention for
fertility. Ritual Element.
A
Red Stone
Describes the tradition of the red stone which women have
historically worn as a tangible expression of their hopes
and fears. Ritual Element.
Round
by Rachel
Boimwall
A contemporary poem on the desire to conceive.
Song/Poem.
If
I had a Son
by Rahel Bluwstein
Contemporary prayer on desire for a son.
Song/Poem.
The
Stain by
Rabbi Nina Beth Cardin with Jane Schapiro and Lynne
Levin
Three contemporary poems addressing “the stain”
of blood which when trying to get pregnant “becomes
a sign of failure, of sadness, of emptiness, of
death.” Poems included: “Tapping a Stone”
by Jane Schapiro; “A Prayer for a woman in search of
comfort” and “The Bath” both by Lynn E.
Levin. Song/Poem.
Remembering
Our Love: Prayers for Husband and Wife
by Rabbie
Nina Beth Cardin
“Some nights are for rest, whether through medical
direction or inclination. Let these nights, then, be for
quiet and tenderness, for the presence of each other, and
for the comfort of now.” Poems and blessings for
those nights follow. Song/Poem.
Miscarriage
Mourning
Loss by
Rabbi Nina Beth Cardin
Essay on the spiritual and emotional issues one
encounters when facing pregancy loss or stillbith.
Article.
Terminolgy
and Background Information
Essay which includes “definitions relating to
pregnancy losses’’; describes the “phases
of attachment” to fetus and child during pregnancy
and after birth; and closes with sections describing
“phases of mourning” and “typical
behaviors of grief”. Article.
Suggestions
for Those Reaching Out to the Bereaved
Essay which helps care-givers, and loved ones reach out
to those who are grieving the loss of a baby due to
miscarriage, stillbirth or neonatal death.
Article.
Finding
Comfort After a Miscarriage
by Susan
Grossman
Complete ritual included with personal introduction.
Entire Ritual.
A
Grieving Ritual Following Miscarriage or Stillbirth
by Amy
Eilberg
A ritual divided into three parts: Mourning the Loss,
Choosing Life Again and Communal Support and Blessings.
Contemporary with selections in Hebrew taken from the
Psalms, Job, and Deuteronomy. Entire Ritual.
Ritual
for Loss of Pregnancy
by Rabbi
Shira Stern
Template for service to mourn all kinds of pregnancy
loss. Entire Ritual.
Neonatal
Death by
Susan Knightly
Personal account of a couple holding, burying, and then
sitting shiva (traditional Jewish mourning practice) for
a baby delivered at five months. First Person
Account.
Sing
us a Lullaby
A prayer for the husband and wife to say during the first
month of the loss. Prayer.
Living
Waters
A prayer to be said before a woman enters the waters of
the mikveh or a bath. Prayer.
After
a Miscarriage: Hold Me Now
by Vicki
Hollander
A contemporary prayer to Hayotzer, “one of the
seventy names of God..translated roughly as “One who
fashions, forms, creates.” Prayer.
Prayer
After Miscarriage or Stillbirth
by Sandy
Eisenberg Sasso
Prayer combining contemporary words and Hebrew from the
High Holy Day Amidah (standing silent prayer).
Prayer.
To
the Baby I Never Had. To the Memory that I Carry.
by Reba
Carmel
A woman mourns the child she lost. Song/Poem.
Healing
After a Miscarriage
by Merle Feld
“I want no platitudes, no stupid shallow comfort. I
hate all pregnant women, all new mothers, all soft
babies.” The anger is wonderfully honest in this
poem. Song/Poem.
When
My Baby Died
by Barbara Daniels
Poem describing author’s response to death of her
baby. Song/Poem.
Pregnancy
Pregnant?
Don’t Eat Radishes
by Emily
Taitz
Article describes charms, prayers and customs that Jewish
women adopted over-time to help ensure a safe pregnancy
and delivery. Article.
Stillbirth
What
Should Jewish Ritual Practice be Following a
Stillbirth?
by Rabbi Stephanie Dickstein
Argument for fuller ritual response for stillbirth.
Author makes argument based on the Conservative
movement’s decision to make parents mourners for
children who die less than 31 days of age.
Article.
A
Midwife’s Kaddish
by Diane
Solomon
Personal essay on auathor’s journey and that of her
Unitarian husband through stillbith delivery and burial
of child. Article.
Memorial
Service for Our Baby and a Reawakening of Hope
by
Susanah/Ted
Example of a complete ceremony developed by the couple
who faced the loss. Entire Ritual.
Baby
Brother’s Gone to Heaven
by Anne-Lynne
Keplar
Description by a mother of her six-year-old son’s
response to the death of his stillborn brother. First
Person Account.
I
Lost a Child But Did Not Mourn Her
by Ron
Wolfson
Personal account describing the author’s experience
of stillbirth before rituals were developed to encourage
mourning. First Person Account.
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